Saturday, 6 August 2011

Istikhara Take One

You guys know the drill.

10 Nights. 10 Entries. With the help of Allah's Counsel, I will be persuaded towards a decision and things may continue to go well or they may well come to a halt.

I'm writing this at 2:15am. I'm tired! So if things don't make sense... make sense of it because I'll most likely be writing at stupid o' clock :) Taraweeh finishes after midnight and I usually stay up til Sehri to fast and pray fajr.

I've started istikhara much earlier than I anticipated but I've done so for good reason. I was sure. Given some food for thought and I became unsure.

It's time to speak to my lord again.

Take One
I've made a commitment to speak to her for a couple of hours everyday since last week. We also speak on loud speaker in presence of her parents and/or siblings. Strictly halal as usual.

I've got a good feel for the kind of girl she is. Masha'Allah! Sincerity to the brim. That's her unique selling point. Winner right? I thought so too.

I met up with my hero after taraweeh for a quick 20 minute chat. The last time we spoke was about 6 months ago since the last prospect. He's my hero for a reason. Allah has blessed him with a brain that I will continue to compete with.

I told him things were going well. I told him my concerns and he addressed them.

He has a point.

This is girl seems like an opposite to the last one. His concern was me. What do I want? The balance of both I guess. 

Do I want a wife that's ready for marriage? Or do I want a wife that's in her infancy in life and people skills?

She's 3 years younger than me. Which makes her pretty young. I need to explore and look into other traits.

First time moving away from home. Being a wife. Putting up with difficult surroundings. Having to study at University. What if she falls pregnant early in the marriage? Whilst her body is going through hormonal changes, would she able to cope with so much change?

Its given me a lot to think about. Time to start breaking things down in my head.

Istikhara take one: Complete. 

Status: Undecided.


  1. It's good that you are doing istikhara. Give her credit. She may be younger than you but some women have amazing strength and character regardless of age. You are right to have concerns about these things but perhaps you should let her think about those things and you think about whether you will be able to fulfil your obligations to her. I'm sure you have already. Like all your posts say, Allah (swt) knows best and is the best of planners. Good luck!

  2. I agree. I can only support her. She has to deal with those things on her own. She's yet to define herself as a person.