Monday, 7 March 2011

Potential #7

I wanted to bring you back to an entry. 'And Then There Was . . . Nine!'

At the end I said:

"So, I present to you potential #1. Mum arranged a meet. To say it was wasn't what I expected it to be, is an understatement.

Totally not what I expected.

 I never got to finish off that story.

It was in Medina mother had met her. After a long night of Taraweeh Salah I would go back to the hotel and catch up with mum and aunt. "She's got beautiful eyes. She's definitely the one." I heard mum say. "Your ammi has found you a wonderful girl" my aunt said.

I lie in bed, dazing.
Life. How much have I achieved in my years?
Ah, my tummy hurts again.
The AC is playing up again. I feel really, really worn out.
Oh yeah. I need to get something for Ahmed.
There goes mum again.
Them two make me laugh, getting in pot shots in dissing each other.

Mum has been talking about this girl everyday. Bless her. She really likes her.

There was a knock on the hotel door. Auntie went to the masjid, mum was doing wudu. I was planning on walking her to the masjid for Isha. I got up and answered the door.

It was a girl. "Can I help you?" I asked. She was looking down. Her left hand made a tiny fiddly gesture with her abaya draping over her hands... like you do when you speak. I heard some quiet mumbling. I made out "Mum. . . yours." I think this was the girl. "Hold on a minute." "Amma... there's a girl waiting for you?" "Ah yes, it's #7. She's taking me to the masjid". This was my cue to leave. I quickly slipped on my sandals, grabbed my miswak and left for Isha. I can't remember the last time I saw such a shy, natural beauty.

My mum grew an attachment to her. So did my auntie. "Khala jee! That's what she calls me! She's like my daughter." mum would always say.

On Eid they were leaving. Mum came back with a piece of paper. 2 contact numbers and an address. "I asked the girl if I could ask for her hand from her parents as she's here with her brothers. This girl has respect, something girls these days lack. I asked her if she liked you and she nodded. When I asked her if she wanted things to go further, she said she's happy if her parents are. She also doesn't do her eyebrows nor does she wear make up. She's the most beautiful girl I've seen. Her eyes, wow.. her eyes! You just don't see girls like this these days. So many beautiful qualities! Vah vah"

This girl meant a lot to my mum. I saw her a number of times with my mum. I'd even avoid walking on the same side of road to the masjid when I saw them together. I've never seen a girl with that level of haya. Deep.

We hit UK. Mum would ring her and talk to her. Here's the funny part. My mum doesn't speak english. Old school and traditional she is. The girl didn't command our language very well either. Yet they spoke for ages. Always made me laugh.

The first meet took place. I'm going to save the details. Lets just say a convenient Uncle dropped by to interrogate 7 shades of information out of me. He has fun toying with me. The gas fire did not help either, I must add. My brother nudged me when I'd get a flurry of interrogative questions thrown at me with that "Ouch" look. This wasn't no ordinary man. He was superman. 9 children from the same wife, all academics. Opened his own madrassa, his sister was the headmaster. He himself was a doctor.

We settled for food. Now how's this for a small world? The brothers of #7 walked in with their friend. That friend, I recognised him. Friend of a friend. Turns out he's married to #7's sister. Now the friend spilled a few beans. "This is Ahmed's arabic teacher." "Oh so you're an arabic teacher. Are there any other things you'd like to share with us?" I said. Everyone started laughing. He grilled me on the command of the arabic language posing scenarios and playing advocate in my future plans. Trying to corner me, spot some kind of flaw in my plans, in me. Turns out he's a sheikh too. Alhamdulillah though, he couldn't corner me. I had nothing to hide. I know how to talk and walk that talk with examples.

Here's what frustrated me. They didn't approach me with any talk of marriage. It was just like a 2 hour interview. Nor did my mum achieve much, things were sketchy. Mum said the grandmother were there and she talked of marriage but there was a miscommunication at some point.

#7 and her mother went to hajj at this point. I had a few concerns and things sounded very slow. We wouldn't hear from them in a while. That's when I had many prospects at that point. It was then I considered this last girl. My mum was quite unhappy but she understood. However, this prospect fell through as you all know.

Fast forward this week.

"I never got to see them after they came from hajj and I want to see #7 and I want to ask them directly this time." mum said. We arranged to meet today. I had to get a bunch of things. Settled for tulips, box of mithai and a of Belgian chocolates and a box of Belgian truffles.

I really like the father. He's such a nice and humble guy. His story is quite amazing. Reverted to Islam 25 years ago. His eyes, I see what my mum was talking about. I loved how simplistic and islamic these people were. Really heartwarming. Good in nature, good in character.

The mother and my mum joined us. My mum was very straight forward about it, she had a long winded speech, then she hit it... "your daughter is such a wonderful girl, masha'Allah. I want to ask if you're able to give her for my son?"

The father looked at his wife. "We haven't even thought about giving her hand in marriage. She's young. We've only just give our first away and she's #4! If she showed interest and more maturity we would have no issues. She's also studying. In a few years.. Allah knows best."

I just smiled. This dude was awesome. Just the way he talked and handled everything. I was cool with it, it really made me no different. I'm way past that.

But my my mother? "I really loved her." [she paused] "I thought it would work out, she's been on my mind since Umrah. You know I only want the best and most pious for you.  "Aww mum, chilllll! Relax!" I brought her close to me "It's all well."

We then had food. #7 came home, we segregated. Had some good banter with the father. The son didn't really speak, he was a year younger than me. I decided to experiment on opening him up with a I've been reading on attitude and body languages. He answered conversations with 1 word responses. Hmmm, I had to try again. Within 2 minutes we were laughing. Within 5 minutes, I connected with him and we talked up until Magrib.

We were leaving. I caught a glimpse of #7 behind her mum. For some reason, this girl really intrigued me. For many reasons.

"I told you that you should have married your cousin. It's all your doing!" We laughed and laughed.

My mum. Bless her. And bless her a thousand times over. I love her.


  1. Salaams brother,

    Alhumduillah, I am so glad you are back on track, Insha Allah, I sincerely do hope things work out for you.
    Waiting eagerly for your next post, Insha Allah

  2. omg, your mum is so cute. May Allah bless all the mothers in this world, they always want whats best for us,subhanAllah look how shes running around for you!

    Your story -telling is on track too.

    I hope everything works out well and this girl sounds top, mashAllah.But what to do with these studies,khair may Allah give us patience.